Hi everyone, hope everyone is doing well. It’s been just over a month since the last update and it’s been an eventful yet uneventful time. To start with the infection seemed to finally eased and I was able to do ok, no fevers and the cough was doing as well as it had for quite some time and it felt pretty good.
The major thing that happened just suddenly out of nowhere was my back and stomach pain just pretty much disappearing, just like that. It was a Saturday evening at 7 I got up to go to the loo and it was sore, I sat down again and the next time getting up, at 9 I was like… this is different… I don’t know what I done or what happened but I was as pain free and flexible as I had been for well over a year, I said to the doctor about it and they were as surprised as I was.
But there’s always something, my hip, knee and leg pain has continued though, I said at the hospital about it and they are referring me to a physio to try and get some relief with it. It’s mostly sore when I’m sitting or lying down, whatever way the pressure is on the leg it feels like it’s being bent or pulled out of the socket and getting into a comfortable position only last for so long before it starts to get sore again. The groin pain occurs when I try to stretch or put any weight on my leg, I get a sharp pain right down past the knee.
I remembered last Saturday that while I was getting my Alendronic Acid the doc had warned about thigh pain so it may be related to that, I’m not going to phone them though and just wait for my normal appointment to see what they have to say, that’s still over a week away though.
The last couple of weeks have been a bit off for me, I got in touch with work about going back again, I know it’s going to be a struggle, a massive struggle and doctors and family have said that I would be best not going back again. For me, I enjoy it, I like a challenge and I would be incredibly annoyed at myself if I didn’t at least try. My boss was on holiday at the time and is going to give me a call when he gets back on Monday and so I thought I would treat the last couple of weeks as a holiday as such.
The first week I focused on my fitness to make sure I would be physically up for doing things, despite the pains in my legs and stomach after a while, I was able to cope pretty well and really pushed myself a few days with doing 4+ hours on the treadmill and some small hill walks around town. This week I have focused on getting out more, doing a few more hill walks but with the weather being so good I’ve been reluctant to push it too much and finally on Wednesday I decided to do a bit of an adventure to one of my favourite spots at Killard Head and then round to St Johns Point Lighthouse, coincidently my dad done the same route earlier that day in the opposite direction. I was enjoying it and so I decided to go for a drive through Newcastle and on round the coast to Newry and then finally back home.
It was nice to get out again and yesterday I decided to take a trip up to Portrush, I was thinking of maybe going to do my proper walk to the Giants Causeway, I knew it would have been too much for me too soon and have put it off, instead I just walked around Portrush and went for a drive down the coast down to Belfast and then I went to my parents to pick up a few things and see them. I was really tired by this stage and went home to pass out for a couple of hours.
Despite actually have a decent enough time the last couple of weeks have been tough and draining, the first week with the prep work I was just trying and trying and willing myself on but I definitely have a limit and then when I looked up the reason the doctor warned about the thigh pain it was incredibly demotivating, it could potentially be the early signs of a leg break. The one thing that’s been driving me on to get better is to get out and do more walking and exploring, I know in a limited capacity compared to what it used to be but something all the same, I’m not a settler and have always pushed myself at everything I do and I wasn’t going to give up on that.
Sunday, I heard a song that I hadn’t for a while and it did lift my spirits for some reason, Razorlight – America, I don’t know why but it helped. And then the second week, as much as I have enjoyed it it’s just been bringing back thoughts from three years ago, coughing, barely able to eat, getting nauseous, fevers and night sweats, and then suddenly feeling fine like none of it had happened. I’m hoping it’s just the hot weather that’s been causing it but when you’ve already been through it twice before and the last time just feeling like yesterday it’s just an awful weight, to think of going through it and putting people through it all again, for what, there just comes a point…
Now I’m trying to think of something that I think I will be able to stomach, my last meal was over 30 hours ago and I was forcing myself cereal which was a real struggle to keep down.